A friend was going through a difficult time having gone through family stressors. She contacted the local nurse as part of her support network. After the nurse listened to everything that had been going on she recommended my friend to ‘self soothe’.
Self-soothing is an emotional, physical, psychological, and biological developmental task every child must learn to develop growing up. Put simply, self-soothing is the ability to calm ourselves down after experiencing something stressful.
I LOVE the expression self soothe. I think it helps us to focus on what WE need to do for OURSELVES after a stressor. This reminds me of Wellness Tools and Stressors which are part of WRAP®, Wellness Recovery Action Plan.
Wellness Tools
These are the things that you do to keep yourself well and the things you do to help yourself feel better when you are not feeling well.
Stressors
These are the external events or circumstances that, if they happen, might cause you to start feeling badly or to be upset. Ideally we avoid or at the very least limit our stressors however we cannot escape them all. So what do we do after stressors? In WRAP® there is Stressor Action Plan this is when we use Wellness Tools.
A lot of the time when we experience stressors we might focus on blame which leads to anger. The problem is how does this help? Back to self soothing what Wellness Tool would make us feel better. Everybody has their own individual Tools. Tennis is a great one for me as I am focusing on hitting the ball. After a Stressor tennis gives my mind a rest from thinking and analysing and blaming and anger! Journaling is another amazing Tool as I find it processes the emotion. Sometimes I write about my stressor and everything that is happening and suddenly I get a shift. I let go of the anger. Powerful stuff when it works.
The main thing is that we focus on what is in our control and what is beneficial for us. Something that will make us feel better and that is the key message from WRAP® the ‘Action Plan’. Remember self-soothing is the ability to calm ourselves down after experiencing something stressful.
So what are you going to do to self soothe during this current stressor or after the next stressor?
There is a WRAP® peer support group in St John of God hospital once a month and a WRAP Cafe in Dun Laoghaire twice a month. Attend a WRAP® course with SOS, Cluain Mhuire, St Pats, Mental Health Ireland or St John of God hospital and you can attend the support group or cafe where the 5 WRAP® Key Concepts, Wellness Tools and WRAP Plan will be discussed.
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