You have heard of the expressions, “You drive yourself crazy” and “Don’t drive yourself crazy.” When you have lost a loved one to suicide, as I have, your mind becomes uncontrollably overwhelmed. I was an expert, a grand-master, at driving myself crazy – wandering in the present but lost in the past.
I was living in a world of mental turmoil and torture, suffering in silence, as I sought answers to questions that could never be answered and how I could have saved the woman I loved from the deadly fate she sought.
I was on a cycle of mental frenzy and overload, a roundabout and loss in search of an exit, an escape. Then one day I decided to start a journal, to write down what I was going through – being brutally honest about the devastating conflicts, the turmoil and torture and the heartbreak within me.
In time, as I saw my thoughts and feelings written on the page, I was able to recognize when my mind was about to take flight on a trip I didn’t want to take. The sadness and sorrow lessened, my heart began to heal but will be forever scarred.
So, take pen in hand and write about your sadness and sorrow, your loss and love, your frustrations and anger, your feelings of helplessness and the moments of joy that filled you with happiness. There will be days when there will be teardrops on the pages, days that will make you laugh, days your heart will bleed and your soul will cry.
But continue writing, one word after another will take you on a journey – destination unknown. But along the way, may you find some saving solace.
Support Our Campaign
We rely on the generosity of the public to fund our work and so far together we have achieved great things! Please do continue to support us so we can provide future generations in Ireland with the resources to recognise and talk about their emotions, and equip them to navigate the ever-changing world around them as they grow
