When going through a moment of change or difficulty, I often forget that what we need most is self-compassion. It reminds of us of our vulnerability, but also that what we’re feeling is valid and in many ways real.
I wrote these notes to myself as a reminder of that. They were inspired by one of my favourite essayists William Hazlitt, whose work was prominent in the 19th century. I love the humanistic quality of Hazlitt’s writing, who was often ostracised for his outlandish comments. But, at his core, Hazlitt was a commentator of people and was able to see the complexity of emotion that makes up the human condition. I hope you find some solace in these notes and perhaps a little laughter too.
On Love
The age old adage of finding one’s true love seems trivial at best in this modern era. For our world is not the land of Shakespeare or Milton, but rather the playground of the Kardashians, lip fillers and dating apps.
It seems like a paltry thing to request a reassessment of love, almost terminal in nature as the results would be banal and ultimately out of touch with what the self longs for.
I often ask what the self needs. It seems that the answer, like a merry-go-round of prevailing emotion, is that love and self are inextricably intertwined. They meet as polarising magnets, necessary, but subject to rigour and change.
In truth, I am in love, and I suppose that means that my self is at last fulfilled. But alas, just like Alice at the end of her journey, I’m learning that what I needed was actually within myself all along. Looking around at the barters on Moore Street, I see the relics of a city that once embraced the foundations of self. Most particularly, the barter and exchange of life that wasn’t wrapped up in the virtual worlds of corporations and profits. For, to love, we must remove ourselves from the virtual and into the more stoic realms of discovery.
I believe love is not lost, at least not in myself. I just wonder if I can extrapolate this feeling and share it with the natural world.
On Self
The self is like a prophecy, but one that we cannot predict. It moves around in such a swirling motion, that captains nor tides can get to grips with its intensity. In short, the self is not worth writing about, for words were not created nor are they fit to capture its majesticism. Despite this, for the purposes of this note, and to aid you in your own discovery, I shall try to parlay that which I have learnt.
The first is that the self is a wolf in the guise of a sheep. It may seem odd to hear this depiction of the self, but bare with me. I feel that the self has all the devilish qualities of darkness itself. It bears the fruits of jealousy, as we try to satisfy it, much to the disregard of others in our lives, and it is selfish in nature, in that it demands us to enter into a codependent relationship, in which we often overcompensate and feel guilt when it is neglected. It is a dark and carnivorous being, on the most basic of levels.
The ‘sheep’, for the purposes of this analogy, is the skin of the soul, or more particularly it is the guise under which the wolf is allowed to enter and occupy our being. The sheep is no less important, as it builds the surface of our character and empathy with others. It is our first barrier to the mortal world and as such it has much to offer us in terms of didacticism.
The two are mirrors to one another. The prey and the predator, that walk the earth in order to sway you from whatever static rock you’ve latched yourself too. They are the soul made up and if you want to learn from them, they would need to be fed and exercised in abundance.
On Animals
If ever you want a direct gateway to love and self, please consult an animal. It will be one of the most rewarding and beneficial exercises you carry out today, as animals, who do not carry the human burden of hate, are in touch with their soul and are able to foster what all humans find so difficult; true love.
Love can be found in their empathy and their ability to foster empathy in a deeply unsympathetic terrain. They are magnets for the soul and bear the fruits of harmony, devotion and intrinsic order. They deserve love, but never request it as a means of self-satisfaction. We can learn how to be more humane from these carriers of the world and their spirit is an enlightening presence to the human hindering of the soul.
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