Learning to forgive

learning-to-forgive

It seems to come in those most doubtful of times, a silent whisper, as if cast by a distant God, dropping to tell you it’s time to forgive.

Undisputed by your intuition, the only obstacle to bestowing forgiveness, is to detach from the rational mind. The mind is dependent on practical reasoning that relies on precision and accuracy. But there is no such definition of inward discovery, as the mountains and valleys you must manoeuvre are susceptible to change and take on the guise of buried emotions and unsaid aspirations. It is in our flow to reconnect with the soul that utter forgiveness gives way to a far greater sense of understanding.

Let down by educational systems that don’t teach you the basis of self-care, it can be hard to differentiate what parts of yourself, and indeed others, are worthy of forgiveness. For the purposes of this discussion, I will limit forgiveness to the self, as ultimately in order to give forgiveness, we must be able to create and hold the space to forgive ourselves. Yet, when we look out on the world, we tend to blame ourselves for its blurred shape. Its misshapenness shouldn’t be interpreted as failure in this instance, but instead with a more critical eye, we can discern that it is the world that needs changing and although this may not be solvable, it can be worked upon with tenderness and an easy caress.

Love is your greatest asset in the battle with forgiveness. When your demons lay claim that you are to blame for your misfortunes, love has the power to act as a battlestick, not just warning them away but eradicating them completely. Love is an equalizer that forces you to acknowledge the parts of yourself that are indeed lovable. It also makes you aware that your insecurities are not a personal quality but a collective human experience. To hear “I love you” is a signifier that you’re enough in this very moment and that darkness can coexist with the lighter dexterity of your soul.

Forgiveness is an act of self-love. Ultimately it frees us from guilt and those unwanted emotions that cause shakes and pains in our body. Love is our weapon in this war and patience is a must if we are to create a space worthy of holding our forgiveness. If freedom is what you aspire to gain, then forgiveness is a method of freeing your soul from within.

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Article by Tadgh Dolan
Tadgh is a writer working in the tech sector in Dublin, Ireland. He loves to find new coffee spots around the city and his favorite book is Alice's Adventure's in Wonderland. Instagram | Website
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