How you can help young people break through societal constructs of ‘the perfect body’

how-you-can-help-young-people-break-through-societal-constructs-of-the-perfect-body
Fitness and Appearance

Summertime, like the New Year is a time when fitness comes into focus. Fitness is extremely important for health, both physical health and mental health but the references to ‘summer bodies’ is a sobering reminder that there is an unhealthy emphasis in society to-day on body image, body shape and size.

Linking fitness to body shape and appearance is particularly unhelpful for our young people. Many young people are already obsessed with their appearance and this is as true for boys as it is for girls. A recent Channel 4 documentary ‘Obsessed With My Body’ followed the lives of boys and young men who were in pursuit of what they felt was the ‘perfect’ body. The programme found that boys could be every bit as insecure about their bodies as girls can be. The programme also confirmed that the number of likes or shares a person’s selfie gets on social media can really impact on that young person’s self-esteem. Selfies are a very shallow and narrow filter through which to determine if someone is likable and yet this is very much a part of teen culture to-day. Making fitness about shape is a damaging message to give anyone and it can have a particularly negative impact on our young.

Minding Mental Health

Body shapes should not be applauded or ever derided. And any robust health and fitness plan, particularly when young people are involved in it, should include a message about the importance of feeling good about your body, whatever the shape. Fitness is just as much about what you think about yourself, what is going on in your thoughts as well as it is being about your physicality. Mental fitness matters just as much as physical fitness – what is optimal is if they are strongly linked together. Here are some ways to support young people to feel good about their bodies, and feel healthy in their minds, while also focussing on their physical fitness:

Checking with Young People about Their Beliefs

It is important that young people have the opportunity to work out their own ideas about how much a person’s body shape matters. Parents can usefully begin a conversation about how much time people spend working on their appearance and ask the young person whether they think appearance does or should matter so much. Even though parents cannot tell their children what to believe, bringing up a conversation about how much the media encourages a focus on body shape and appearance, makes young people aware. Parents can also educate young people about how the beauty industry is largely linked to economics and making money. Once young people have more awareness, they have more choice about what to believe.

Their Experience of Body Image Online

It is important for young people, particularly if they are on social media, to become aware of their own body-image and how much they link their body-image to their sense of self-worth. Many teenagers, male and female spend a lot of time perfecting and editing selfies and this effort is so they feel better about themself. It is a ubiquitous part of teenage culture today to post selfies. And while parents may not be able to influence teenagers to stop posting them, parents can help young people to understand that the likes they get or don’t get for selfies does not automatically have to affect their self esteem. Again, self awareness is key and young people can be encouraged to monitor how feedback they get online is impacting their sense of self worth.

Separating Out the Focus on Health and Fitness from Body Image

Parents can lead by example for young people by separating out their own experience of healthy eating and exercise from a focus on their body shape. By linking a focus on healthy eating and exercise to your shape is to give young people a particular message. The message they will get is that health is about body shape. But health is not about body shape and some very physically fit young people are displaying symptoms of anxiety, depression and chronically low self esteem because so much emphasis is placed on shape. Therefore, these young people are physically fit but not healthy because their mental health is compromised. Parents, by not applauding their own body shape or anybody else’s body shape, will contribute to the creation of a healthy home environment for their children. That means healthy in a mentally healthy way.

Fitness is about so much more than physical health. It is about mental health too. It is for that reason that we all need to stop applauding body shape despite what certain sectors of media might wish us to believe.

Anne McCormack is a Systemic Psychotherapist registered with FTAI and ICP.

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Article by Anne McCormack
A Psychotherapist, parent, writer, Irish Times contributor, and lecturer, Anne McCormack is the author of ‘Keeping Your Child Safe on Social Media: Five Easy Steps’ which is available in bookshops nationwide throughout Ireland. Anne is passionate about adolescent mental health and mental fitness. For more information on the topic of social media and adolescents, go to annemccormack.ie or find her on Twitter @MentalFitnessXX
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